February 18, 2025 | 07:15 pm
TEMPO.CO, Jakarta - Clinical psychologist Teresa Indira Andani emphasized the importance of knowing your partner before getting married, as marriage is not only about love, but also the long-term collaboration between partners.
"In relationships, interdependence plays a key role, where partners need to collaborate, combine resources, and face life's challenges together. Therefore, knowing your partner is crucial and fundamental," said the University of Indonesia graduate psychologist, quoted by Antara on Tuesday, February 18, 2025.
She explained that marrying without getting to know a partner's personality, life values, and how they handle stress and conflict increases the risk of incompatibility. This can lead to conflict avoidance issues or even dominant control and domestic violence (DV) in the relationship.
DV may also stem from the absence of psychological intervention against the abuser, ongoing contact with an ex-partner due to children, or the victim developing trauma bonding—an emotional attachment to the abuser despite the violence.
With a solid understanding and thorough preparation before marriage, partners can create a stable relationship, support one another, and reduce harmful conflicts.
Moreover, effective communication and healthy conflict resolution are crucial for a harmonious partnership. Developing emotional regulation skills is also key to managing stress and differences in a positive way, helping to lower the risk of ghosting or domestic violence (DV).
With this, partners can build a stable, healthy, and supportive relationship in various phases of life.
"Preparing for marriage is not just about material things, but also psychological readiness, emotional, and relationship skills. Partners need to understand how to communicate, resolve conflicts, and adjust marriage expectations through pre-marital counseling or open discussions about values, roles in the household, parenting styles, and financial management," said Teresa.
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